She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I'm both gender and math confused
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize