Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
