we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
