it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
