i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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