i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Just invented taco cereal.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize
