she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
