So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
