They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
