so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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