Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
