Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
