I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
