I think I died a long time ago.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
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