I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
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