I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
