That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
