You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize