Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Randomize
