did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Hippo gnu deer
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
