i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Also, beer. Big fan.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Randomize
