Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
foreskin is a definite game changer
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
