Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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