But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
