Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Randomize
