so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
