pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
