I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
