Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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