you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
