You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize