An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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