ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
honey bunches of taint.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
