You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
