I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
