i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
be right there i have to get my cape
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
