dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
