i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Im part way to drunk.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
