she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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