I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
