Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
