his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
