I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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