As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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