She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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