hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
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