I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
