We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize