He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
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