I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize