My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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